If you’re someone who has been single for a while, you might be used to people trying to assuage you with anecdotes and ‘law of attraction’ style mantras. Not only are these things quite unhelpful, but they don’t necessarily make you want to dive headfirst into the dating pool. Sometimes in dating, all you really want to hear is a generous dose of truth. If you’re looking to meet someone wonderful, truth and simplicity are key, as are taking small steps in the right direction. If you’re feeling like you’ve been single for eternity.
Here are three modest truths you might need to hear.
#1 Keeping An Open Mind Is Key
Are you someone who demands a meet-cute, rather than scrolling through an app? Perhaps, you have a mental checklist longer than the Geneva Convention. Standards are great, but remember to keep an open mind. Don’t shut the proverbial door on someone because they don’t check every box. More importantly, don’t close yourself off to all of the modern ways there are to meet someone. A recent study by PEW found that 59 percent of people agree that online dating and unconventional methods are the best way to meet new people.
Try new dating apps, engage in a round of speed dating, join a social club, or head to karaoke night at the local pub. Sure, you may not have imagined yourself cycling through potential mates at speed dating events or swiping right on an app, but there is promise in each of these places. With 45 percent of the population citing single status, keeping an open mind could lead to your next relationship.
# 2 Being Single Isn’t The Worst-Case Scenario
Society would have us believe that life as a single person should be stressful and void of meaning. In reality, your life can be very fulfilling without a partner. In fact, you should never have to rely on another person to bring value or substance to your world. Focus on the fun aspects of dating and being on your own. Don’t let the frustrations of searching for a partner bog you down. Remind yourself that this is a great time in your life to grow, learn, and meet some new people.
More and more people are choosing to stay single long-term or indefinitely. Married couples only outnumber singles by 12 million. That gap has narrowed significantly since the 1950s when it was 37 million. Take the pressure off of yourself by taking time to be self-aware and patient with where you’re at. Your life has meaning with or without a significant other, so have fun, go on dates, and know in your heart that no matter what the outcome is of your endeavors, you’ll be okay.
#3 You Have To Make Yourself Available
People open up their phones 52 times a day. That’s 52 missed opportunities to make ourselves available. Most of us like to tune out from our public surroundings with earbuds or by endlessly scrolling through social media. However, these distractions keep us from fully paying attention to what is happening in the world around us. Making yourself available means being aware and approachable. Even if you’re shy or a bit socially anxious, simply seeming free of distraction and open to possibility can cause someone special to approach. Perhaps, you might even notice a potential mate you would have otherwise missed. Tune into your surroundings and be open to the possibilities that are all around you!